Gypsy
Vardo

I have to take a moment to tell you about these guys. Normally I wouldn't, because it's disgusting, but they were a part of things, so you can either skip this page or bear with me. If you read on, I don't want to hear any whining. You were warned fair and square.

This is irritating fly #2346. (or #3458. I can never get them straight.) In case you aren't able to see, he's partially painted yellow. I swear this is NOT my doing, so no calling the Prevention of Cruelty to Bugs people on me!! Irritating fly #2346 flew into my wet paint all of his own accord. In fact, they did this with startling regularity. (I probably could have included pictures of red, green, and primer pink flies, but then I'd just be mocking them.)

"Why did they do this?" you ask. I dunno. Not too bright, I guess."Why were they there?"

Well, that's an easy one.

See, this was the view from the house...

...and this was the view from pretty much everywhere else. For miles and miles, there were farms. It was stunningly beautiful country. The cows were fun to watch, but they do seem to keep company with the little monsters, so there you go. My first week was warm, and the flies hung out on my freshly painted boards getting little fly tans or something. At night they did unspeakable things that forced me to WASH the boards and curse the little *&%$#@s in the mornings. (I'll bet you didn't know that flyspeck shows through paint. I didn't at the time, but I do now.)

My second week was cold, and the horrid little things got sluggish. You'd think that would be a good thing, but that was when they started flying into things, falling into wet paint, and getting squashed between the boards as we stacked them. I thought I'd be delighted when they started having mishaps, but I soon realized that even those were a headache as I found myself to scraping their ugly little corpses off my fresh walls. Fortunately, you CAN paint over those if you miss a few.

So anyway... even a red wagon can look a bit drab until you add some contrasting trim.